Reviews From The Nut Gallery - Two

People are still shy to comment openly on the posts and Facebook and shit. Or I'm a twat who makes private conversations public... you'd think that'd stop a certain number of people from talking to me, or at the very least sending me dicktures that I'm not allowed to use here... It doesn't.



J#### from #AdultForum# (below) wins the trophy for this week. If there are any ladies out there looking for an intelligent guy to grind your sex organs against/with, I will save you a lot of this shit (and time) and vouch for this guy. Send your intro and photo and I will forward the ones who pass my Screening For Dudes Test.

"I must say that I initially felt like I was somehow emotionally raped when I got your reply.

I send you an email hoping to make some kind of emotional contact with you. That I hope, to be straight forward, would eventually be the inital cause of us having hot kinky sex. I did write you from #AdultForum# so it's not like my motives should have been unclear.

Instead I got dragged into your social media machine, and I felt violated. You had no interest in creating a connection beyond you wanting me to read your blog.

Then I started to read your blog.

I started to feel less violated.

For one, that Steve story was hot and got me hard. The friends with benefits story was hot and got me hard. Two boners donated. The conversation with AC made me laugh out loud. The douche bag rapist story [this one??] got me to think and we share a similar belief system. I agree with you about the ugly baby sueing father.

Now rather than raped I felt more intelligent than I was before. I have concluded (hopefully not in error), that you asking me to read your blog and asking for feedback was you making an emotional connection, however small.

I also realised that while I thought I had my shit together, as to who I was and my views on the world, I have a ways to go. You have your shit together, t's crossed and i's dotted. Or at least that is the way it comes across when reading your musings.

This of course is incredibly hot.

Confidence and integillence when coupled with self awareness is powerful, seductive and oh so hard to find.

So thank you for having amazing tits and a hot torso (or paying for a model that has them). Because they are what got me to read your profile. Your profile got me to write, which in turn got me a link to your blog.

So now I wait to see if this reply garners a reply.

J####

P.S. "No one is fucking safe from my reality checks"

I love that line."


As if anything else needs to be said after that... but I can't go playing favourites, so keep reading.

I think this may be the first "Bad Review",
the implication that I needed illumination  in an area (or two?)... or ??
But since he didn't even read the blog
[his words: No time to read],
I hardly think it counts at all.

"Marketing genius; captive audience, mostly internet savvy (or savvy enough to find dumb women to sleep with them online, or whatever happens, fuck I don't know I pretty much only get pinged by hookers and cam scams, and writers looking for attention LO, props to you for thinking up that plan. Sorry I am mentioning this again but I really am impressed with your ingenuity.

Still after reading your blog I am wondering about your gender. Which is also intriguing and seems to keep me coming back for more. Don't ruin the surprise, I would like to find out if you get a book deal. For some reason that feels appropriate."

The company name isn't Literary Boners, Ink
for no good reason ;)

"Its funny no matter what gender you are, I really think you would be a great drinking buddy."


"Still impressing me! Keep up the good work. Like the frequency of the blogs. Keeps me coming back.

Rub out as many blogs as you can they are entertaining.

Any more advice is always welcome."

Lmao, I tol' ya I was fuckin' lit'rate.

"Our society has an incredibly short attention span, mainly due to the innumerable ways in which we have access to and gather information. So having the wherewithal to create a many theaded spider web of social media avenues for people to see your work is admirable. But maintaining that web, and keeping contact with the flies you have caught is quite a feat."


"You might be the most intelligent woman on this site. Possibly the entire internet, actually."


"wow.. i am absolutely amazed... i have never heard such deep sarcasm.. its actually quite impressive.. i think there should be a sarcasm font.."


"Well, I have to admit, I found quite a few things in your blog fascinating. I may just bookmark it and keep up to date with it as best as I can.

And to keep up appearances as a guy, I have to say that you have a very hot body."

"Tell a goddamn friend!"
In retrospect, that's what I should said.

What? That wasn't enough "it's a good time, for real!" for you? You want further assurances that sometimes it's not a complete waste of time to read rather than look at the pictures? Reviews From The Nut Gallery The First


Or perhaps you're the type who likes this "kind of" entertainment more... Even if you don't, you'll probably listen all the way through, too.